She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
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The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
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The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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