yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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