Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
