My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Randomize
