Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
