Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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