seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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