Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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