Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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