she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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