i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
