She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
