Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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