If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize