called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
