don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
