Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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