in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
