I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It's just like the Real World with babies
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
