I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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