He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
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the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
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Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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