But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
