FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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