yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
