I just cut my nipple shaving
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
