i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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