they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
