You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
