i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
