At least make sure they are 18
Why
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
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