Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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