if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
