A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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