I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
