Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
