Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
