does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
