So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
