She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
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