I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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