Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
