so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
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