If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize