even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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