yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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