Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
So I just went to clothing optional bar
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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