I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
