I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Randomize