She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
