you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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